“I am the problem.” Grey says in a miserable voice. “Look at some of the things that happened to you because of me.” He can’t deny he’s bad for Jo, she’s always getting hurt because of him or doing things she wouldn’t because of him. He can see that now with what happened with Gordon. “There’s no options, you don’t get it. I can’t eat people, there’s not enough good energy in monsters or demons to take without killing them. There’s just… no way.”
“You’re not the problem, Grey. Look at all the good things that happened because of you..” Jo shifts closer, smiling faintly back at him as her fingers close tighter around his arm gently. “There’s plenty of options. You could.. you could body hop when goin’ out to feed so your-this face wouldn’t be tracked, you could target the ones with the most good energy and..supplement it somehow if you don’t kill them. Killing bad things isn’t bad, hun..”
“I’m the problem. I’m a monster, I have to hurt people or kill things to stay alive. And I get punished for that. I don’t want to be punished again.” Grey shivers violently for a moment thinking about it. “I don’t want to have anything else bad happen to me because of what I do or am.”
“You’re not a problem, Grey. You’re the opposite of a problem!” Jo reaches out automatically as he shivers, fingers wrapping around his upper arm gently as she moves closer. “Well, if it’s the hurtin’ or the killing that makes you worried, there are other options to killing, right? And…and I’ll try to keep anything else from ever happening from my side, hun..”
Grey grimaces. “It’s not about the pain.” He hunches his shoulders and ducks his head. “It’s not even about the demon.” He’s tired of death and tired of causing it. That’s why he got caught, he was being punished.
“Then what’s the problem?” Jo tilts her head back at him, squinting like the answer will pop up in front of him. “I’m happy to help with anything that helps you get your energy back, Grey..”
“What are we going to do, let it go? Not going to happen.” Grey chuckles bitterly. Jo saying she will take care of it after makes him frown, pulling his arms close to his body and crossing them over his chest. “I’m not comfortable with that idea either.”
She bites on her lip as he chuckles and pulls back slightly into himself, frowning at him. “It’s not like I haven’t done that kind of thing before. But… would you feel better if I knocked it out? Then it’s not aware of what’s goin’ on, there’s… uh, no pain?” Jo twists her hands together in the towel before setting it down over the rack behind her, not sure if she could continue to look at Grey in the eye given his reaction.
He gets the jeans buckled and zipped before turning back around. “I know. I know it’s not.” He mumbles. “I just… don’t feel like killing anything. Even a demon.” He’s had enough time to think about pain and death, he’s not happy to imagine inflicting any. Grey leans on the sink. “And the energy I’d need, and the fact it’s a demon, would mean I have to.”
“You don’t have to kill anythin’ if you don’t want to, Grey.” She waited for him to stop moving, resting against the sink, before she moves closer, picking his discarded towel up as she glances at him curiously. Obviously Gordon had gotten to him much more than just through physical damage , an reaching out to test how dry he’d gotten his hair, Jo sighs again. “Just take some from it, and some from something else, and I’ll take care of what happens after.”
“I’ll… well there’s a demon. I could get that. Just need to get dressed first.” And maybe after another nap he thinks to himself. When she covers her eyes and holds out the jeans his lips twitch a bit in a quick smile. He pulls them on as quickly as he can without damaging his leg or having to really hop since he doesn’t want to pull at the stab wound.
Jo ducks her head, trying not to show the smile at his mentioning the demon - it had been a real argument with herself about whether or not he was going to agree quick enough for it to be worth the time of keeping it trapped or not. Listening to him fumble, she peaks through her fingers to see how he was going with whatever complicated shifting he was doing before speaking. “Yeah, well it’s not here for it’s health or my amusement, hun. Should get somethin’ in you, you know..”
Grey makes a small sour noise of protest at her saying she needs to look at the wounds. He wraps the towel tighter, tucking it into itself to keep it up on his waist before taking the shirt and pulling it over his head. “No. I don’t really.” He admits, looking at the other clothes instead of at Jo. “But it’s fine. Nothing life threatening. It’s been worse before.”
“Yeah, but those times you had someone to help fill that tank back up with gas..” Jo quirks an eyebrow at him, even as she’s sure he’s trying to avoid her significant glances. Letting out a sigh and rolling her eyes, she holds out his jeans with one hand for a moment before covering her eyes with the other one. “For petes sake, I’ll pretend I can’t see you and then we’ll go and work on that and check your wounds.”
Hearing the knock and then the door opening, Grey quickly moves the towel from his head to around his waist. “You’re supposed to wait a second after knocking before coming in.” He shakes his head, looking at what she’s brought. “No. A couple are still… bleeding a little.” He turns so the one on his leg is hidden on the other side of him away from Jo, not wanting her to see how deep it is and worry.
“Not like I haven’t seen it all before, Grey. And what I haven’t is what I need to look at anyway.” She holds out the shirt to him, as her eyebrows crease into a frown as she tries to spot which of the cuts littered about were bleeding enough to get his attention. “Don’t have the, uh, juice to start healing them your way yet?”
Grey hears Jo from inside the bathroom where he’s drying off gingerly with a towel. Besides the wounds on his neck and wrists there’s the deep gouge in his thigh and numerous other cuts or punctures from Gordon’s poking and prodding. Some of the smaller ones are scabbed over already but other ones bleed again on the towel as he pats himself dry. “Jo could you get me some clothes from upstairs?” He calls quietly while putting the dirty clothes in the hamper and moving to towel his hair. He could smoke up there and grab some but he doesn’t have the energy right now.
Turning about at the voice in the next room over, Jo nods her head before realising he wouldn’t be able to see. “Sure, no problem.” There’s audible relief that he’s interested in something other than resting and sleeping right at this moment as she calls back, dashing up the stairs to grab some jeans and a tshirt for him, considering grabbing a hoodie but figures she’ll come back for it if he wants, before stumbling back down stairs and knocking on the bathroom door once and then heading in, clothes in front of her. “Did any of the… is any of those deeper ones scabbin’ yet?”
Jo’d been trying not to head too far out of town, or really even too far away from the house - mostly doing calls and trading hunts with other hunters at the bar to cover those she and Grey weren’t going on themselves as she waited for the shadow to show any signs of improvement since she’d freed him. Thus far, nothing.
Deciding that he at least had to try some kind of steps, feeding or healing or anything, Jo slips out of the kitchen where she’d been overseeing the now resigned demon as she made herself a coffee and let Grey rest, and moves toward the lounge - not sure if he’d be there or the bathroom or what. “Grey… I wanted to..check your wrists again.” She fumbles over a reason as she peers around the corner of the doorway, heading in quietly.